If you are a regular reader of this blog, you’ll know I’m a big fan of Lolly Daskal, here is her take on resilience, originally seen in Inc.
The truth is that life can be tough, business can be hard-hitting and success comes with challenges. What separates those who can hold their own and keep going in times of adversity is a cluster of habits that center on resilience.
Resilience means developing a strong solid level of mental toughness. We aren’t born with it–it’s a habit you develop, a skill you learn. And it’s absolutely essential.
Here are four core habits of the most resilient people:
1. They’re connected to their emotions.
Resilient people understand their emotions and how to manage them. Some people say that suppressing what you feel is the best approach when you’re going through tough times, but it’s just the opposite–suppressing your emotions can backfire. People who are highly anxious or have a lot on their minds tend to struggle with unwanted thoughts. Resilient people are connected to their emotions and self-aware, which gives them more control.
2. They don’t listen to negative voices in their heads.
Resilient people are able to get past the negativity and dig deeper to discover what’s triggering it. Then instead of taking it to heart, they’re able to turn it into positive intentions. Resilient people are optimistic and believe in their own strength and ability to overcome any problems. In a crisis, a resilient person will be positive, open and willing to find the solution. They will not be dwelling on the problem but looking forward to the future solutions that should be considered.
3. They know how to bounce back.
Resilient people know how bounce back, The word Resilience has its origin in the Latin word resilire, which means to jump back. Resilience is knowing how to bounce back from adversity and life challenges. It’s something any of us can do–we just need to learn how. Tough-minded resilient people will not allow life’s circumstances to push them down and hold them under.
4. They don’t need to control everything.
Resilient people are comfortable with not controlling everything. They know how to come to terms with external circumstances; they understand that the only thing they can do is focus on what’s within their sphere of control–their own attitude, their own emotions, their own behavior.
These habits are not easy to cultivate, but if you make them a part of your emotional toolkit they will help you develop the strength and toughness to get through the worst of times.